We know there’s a lot of talk out there about why elopements are better than weddings, or why you might regret the way you celebrate your day by choosing one or the other. We’re here to tell you that it’s not about what everyone else thinks or says. Because when it all comes down to the basics: your wedding day is about you two. The truth is, you can elope and have a wedding reception, too!
Our team at Skyewater believes that whatever you decide, you should feel 100% supported, excited, and comfortable with your wedding day without any regrets. But if you aren’t sure whether an elopement or a larger, traditional wedding is right for you, we’ve put together some insight below to help you decide what feels like the best fit.
And if you already know you want to elope and have a post-elopement party after, keep scrolling to read all about planning a fun reception after you elope!
Elopement vs. Wedding: What’s the difference?
What is an elopement?
Not everyone has the same opinion of what makes an elopement, but here are the basics of our definition: authenticity, freedom, and comfort. At the core of the elopements we help create for our couples, we focus on making sure the day feels authentic to their love story and personalities. We also want to encourage you to think outside of the box, to feel free to express who you are, to have the freedom to keep the traditions you want and do without the ones you don’t.
We also believe in providing a safe and supportive space for each unique couple to choose which activities they’d like to incorporate into their day, what type of scenery they feel most comfortable in, and feel relaxed or at ease, knowing they won’t regret a single minute of it.
Busting Elopement Myths
By our definition, it’s not about making some last-minute decision to elope to the courthouse or take a trip to Vegas (although those are always on the table if that’s what you really want!). It’s about being extremely intentional about where you want to get married, who (if anyone) will be there, and how you want to celebrate outside of traditional norms.
This means that:
- Yes, you can elope by yourself without anyone there or you can invite a few people to join you. Eloping with friends and family is totally okay!
- No, it doesn’t have to be a secretive, last-minute plan. Many of our couples plan their elopement experiences 6, 9 or even over 12 months in advance!
- No, you don’t “have to” elope in a specific place. While there are a lot of people opting for hiking elopements these days, there are plenty of other ways to elope in the outdoors: on a boat, on a 4WD road, in a helicopter . . . the ideas are endless.
- Yes, you can still keep some (or all) of the traditions from a larger wedding. From first dances to hearing toasts from your parents, nothing is off the table.
How are elopements and weddings different?
A few of the biggest differences between elopements and weddings might be obvious to some, but in case this helps you:
Guest Count
Elopements are often considered to be either just the two of you, or a small group of no more than 10 people. Weddings on the other hand can be from about 15-20 people to events as large as 200-300.
Location
Elopements give you the freedom to be almost anywhere, like the top of a mountain, beside the ocean, out on the water, inside a canyon, you name it! Larger weddings require a designated space where there is room for your guest count. This means you’d need a venue space like a ranch/barn, ballroom/hotel resort, botanic garden, rooftop, etc. for all of your guests to come together.
Stress
It’s no secret these days that planning large events creates a lot of stress. Some couples even start to plan a full wedding day and partway through realize it just doesn’t feel authentic or worth it to them and opt for eloping instead.
5 Ways to Celebrate Your Wedding
If you can think of marriage celebrations as being on a giant scale with a range of options, elopements with just the couple can be one side of the spectrum, and bigger weddings with 100-200+ guests sit on the opposite side of the spectrum. In the middle is a large gray area: one with several amazing options you might not have even considered yet. Here are some ways to think outside of the box:
Have a Small Wedding
Maybe you can’t imagine not celebrating with your closest friends and family. Or maybe you are feeling the pressure from your parents, siblings, or others you love who would be devastated to not be there to witness your special day. Small weddings can be one of the best ways to compromise!
If you already know the big countryside ranch or elegant ballroom space that fits up to 300 people doesn’t feel right to you, maybe it’s better to find a more intimate venue space where 40-75 people can fit comfortably and spend more quality time together.
Plan a Destination Wedding
Still want several other people there with you on the big day, but can’t imagine celebrating somewhere locally? Consider having a destination wedding, where you can have the perks of an elopement (scenery, adventure, fun activities, etc.) in a new and exciting place while also inviting guests to join you. There are many great rental properties that allow events on VRBO, or you can book a trip for the whole group to all-inclusive resorts in places like Costa Rica, Hawaii, or Mexico.
Elope Without Guests, Celebrate with Family After
Full day or two-day elopements are not uncommon for this exact reason! This type of plan gives couples the chance to say their vows in private on their own adventure, and either meet up with family and friends later in the day or the following day. It’s a great way to compromise having an elopement in private while also celebrating with people you love.
Add-on an Adventure Session in Your Wedding Attire
Last but certainly not least, another exciting way to think outside the box is to have a small wedding or larger, traditional celebration, but then schedule a fun adventure session with your photographer and/or videographer separately. You can use this as an opportunity to do a first look and/or say private vows before a larger wedding later, or you can plan to get back into your wedding attire for one of your anniversaries.
Elope and Celebrate with a Large Reception Later
Several of our couples at Skyewater Photo + Film come to Colorado either by themselves or with a small group of 5-10 people, and then opt for a larger reception back at home a few months later. And if you have us booked for both photo and video, this is a fun way to show off your photos and/or highlight video to your guests at the dinner reception later in the year.
how to plan a post-elopement wedding party
Ready to get started planning a fun post-elopement celebration with your friends + family? Here are all our insights and answers to the most commonly asked questions we get about planning a wedding reception after your elopement day.
When to Host Your Post-Elopement Party or Wedding Reception
The most important factors about the timing for your reception come down to personal preference and location.
Some people prefer to celebrate their post-elopement party the same day, by eloping just the two of you (or a very small group) followed by an intimate dinner later in the evening. Or you can opt to celebrate the day after your elopement for a 2-day wedding or a wedding weekend!
If your elopement location is far from home or not close to where all your guests live, then it may be easier to plan for a day about 2-3 months after your elopement. This gives you enough time to fully enjoy your elopement without additional stress about what comes next, and many couples love that they often have some/all of their photos and/or video back to be able to show all their reception guests!
You can even push it farther back and have the reception a year after your elopement on your first anniversary. There really are no “rules” for when your post-elopement party has to occur!
Who Should You Invite to Your Post-Elopement Party?
We’re big believers that no matter how you choose to celebrate your marriage, only the people you want to be present should be invited.
But we also know every family is different, and if the pressure or obligations you feel about inviting everyone is too much stress to deal with, you don’t have to limit your reception guest count if you don’t want to.
That said, keep in mind that the larger your celebration is, the more you’ll need to budget for when it comes to finding a big enough space to host everyone, and enough food/drinks to go around. If you’re needing help narrowing down the guest list, here are a few tips:
- Focus primarily on the people you can’t imagine not having there first.
- For anyone you don’t see or talk to on a daily/weekly basis, ask yourself: when was the last time I saw/spoke to this person? If it’s been longer than a year, would this be a great reason to celebrate with them, or would you only be inviting them out of obligation?
- Would their presence make you more stressed or feel less like your true self? For anyone you’re considering inviting, we always suggest keeping the list to those who you’d actually enjoy being your true self around.
- Does our venue have a max guest count? Whether you’re hosting a backyard event at a family member’s home or VRBO, or you’ve found a dream venue to host one epic party, staying under this guest count may help you “weed out” any people who don’t need to be there.
- Limit plus-ones to significant others you actually know.
- Consider having a child-free reception. You may be surprised how many parents actually want a child-free event and a night off!
Announcing Your Elopement at the Reception
Wondering how to tell everyone you’ve eloped?
There are essentially two ways to go about this:
1. Put the announcement on your invites/save the dates. If you’re okay with everyone knowing in advance that this will be a reception only and that your ceremony will be private, adding details about how you’re excited to celebrate with them upon your return can be a nice way to keep it positive while also reducing the element of surprise.
or 2. Treat the invites/save the dates as you would with a normal wedding, and then announce your elopement at the reception with everyone present and show off elopement photos and/or video to everyone there!
How Much Does a Post-Elopement Party Cost?
One of the best things you can do to reduce stress when it comes to planning a post-elopement party is to work out a budget in advance.
While a more laid back “party” can be more budget-friendly than an entire wedding celebration, it does still involve finding a space big enough to host everyone, feeding everyone well, offering drinks/beverages of some kind, and planning for activities, such as dancing or playing games together.
Generally speaking, most couples tend to budget somewhere between $10,000-20,000 for a post-elopement reception, and a lot of this comes down to your guest count, venue/location, rentals, and food/drinks.
If you’re hoping to stay under the $10k range, here are some more budget-friendly low-cost ideas to consider:
- Limit your total headcount to 75 guests or fewer (even better if you have less than 50!).
- Find a restaurant, brewery, winery etc. that includes everything you need (private space, tables, chairs, linens, food, drinks, etc.) all under one package price rather than quoting out for each thing separately.
- Opt for beer + wine only rather than a full open bar.
- Celebrate on a weekday or a weekend morning. Many venues, restaurants, and other vendors charge less for weekdays or for brunch celebrations compared to Friday / Saturday night events.
- Host a potluck or bring in food trucks. This one will greatly depend on making sure your family/friends are the types to enjoy participating in bringing food to the event, or to have enough space for food trucks to park and operate at your location.
What to Wear to Your Elopement Reception
Another great thing about hosting an elopement reception later is that you have flexibility about what to wear! Some couples love hopping back into their same wedding-day attire, and others really love opting for something simpler or less “wedding” like altogether.
The key is to really think about the vibe, the activities, and how you want to ultimately feel at your post-elopement party. Whether that means you want to change up the color, style, formality, or you truly love your chosen wedding day outfits so much you want to get the most out of what you paid, there’s no wrong answer here.
Post-Elopement Party Venue + Location Ideas
Finding the right location for your reception will depend on the season, your guest count, any activities you may want to include, and its proximity to your guests. But here are some of our favorite ideas in the PNW area below to give you inspiration:
What does an elopement reception look like?
The truth is, each one will look different, and should be tailored to your unique vision, personality, and overall vision for the event.
But if you want to get a sense of the possibilities, you can watch this wedding video of Alex + Erin’s elopement in the mountains with immediate family only, followed by an epic reception at a local winery in Denver. The best of both worlds!
Chat with Our Elopement Photo + Video Team
With experience capturing elopements and weddings of all sizes, we’re here to guide you and offer any insight and advice we can throughout the planning process. Our ultimate goal is always to help you find what feels like the right fit for such a special day in your life.
It’s important to know that not all photographers + videographers out there document both elopements and weddings. Some elopement photographers have a max guest count of only 10 or 20 people, and other wedding photographers may occasionally document small elopements, but they aren’t an expert nor do they offer planning assistance like we do.
We’re one of the few photo + video companies that loves documenting both parts of your celebration!
Skyewater Photo + Film is an adventure elopement and destination wedding photo and video team based in Washington. We help couples plan elopements all over the US, and offer insight for more than just photography: from planning assistance, finding and booking locations, vendor references and more! Reach out to our elopement photography and videography team today to get more info!
